A lapse ....a look into the worries of a carer and her family x

This picture typifies  the life that me and my family have faced for years....i have never blogged about this before. Ive mentioned that we   have a son that has autism...we love him very much , Ive never mentioned how hard it is to have an NORMAL LIFE ..whats normal??? For us its the every day struggles  of living with some one who's reality is totally different to the norm...whats normal???

 The hopes and expectations that you have when you first hold this amazing person when their first born.....the rush of love that has no bounds...the bond that are there till the day you die....My baby nearly died at birth an experience that i still struggle to come to terms with we were told then that he had a very high risk of some kind of brain damage but thank god he grew into the wonderful son he is  now...........

 Yes he has problems ...........but who doesn't have  yes hes on the spectrum with every thing that goes with that!!Yes we have  constant frustrations that come from someone who's  so sensitive  mentally and physically.Ive read  for years carbon copies of my sons problems that thousands of families   also have to go through on a daily basis........

We fumble through life.......constantly with  is he OK  will this set him off have i handled this right!! Unfortunately not all the help or support we have been given over the years has been good or positive they've hovered on the sideline  some really nice well meaning people but  we felt because we were a supportive and loving family we were  just left to cope...especially in the last five years..........

 and NO i didn't put in for all the  monetary benefits that i was told too.....i never put in for caring allowance or high payments....i  always thought well I'm his mother i care for him anyway. I  was wrong!! how i wish id done this and maybe i wouldn't be in the dire situation I'm in now.............I'm talking about government cut backs!! We've been left for years to sort things out or selves ...lovely mental health nurses popping in  every two weeks for thirteen years to SEE how things are....Sean's  friends as he would think.i so  didn't want this to turn into a rant!! but like so many people hes been put onto social care????  what is this???  no explanation?   a meeting with a social worker who was more interested in her car parking meeter running out??? she doesn't know my son??  she was RUDE AND INAPPROPRIATE??? whats going on?????

whats going on is we've been dumped! like millions of people in the same situation...government cut backs!!! Ive listened to dozens and dozens of people who are scared....unsure of their future...don't know what to do ...a bit like us......my son now has someone who comes out once a week to walk with him to help him get over his agoraphobia.an amazing man...a christian man  who my son really likes...he likes most people...he has three month to get him back to NORMAL!!  whats normal???? the mind boggles at the people who are the experts!!! the people in the know!!!...sorry this has turned into a rant.........but i don't know where to turn.or whats going to happen  in the future its never been about money its about support and help...my heart goes out to those people who have no one .a sign of these awful times we live in xxxxxxxxx